Your Short Skirt is NOT an Invitation

What does your skirt say about you? Does it depict your sense of style, or the latest fashion trend, or simply that it’s too hot to wear pants? When you decide to wear a skirt are you worried about being cat called or sexually harassed? Are you upset when people call you out of your name by saying “Yo Ma,” “Psst,” or “Shawty with the face”? What kind of words are these, this just shows how unintelligent men are. “My short skirt is not an invitation, a provocation, an indication, that I want it, or that I hook,” an excerpt from the poem “My short skirt” - by Eve Ensler.

According to the U.S. Department of Education, “Sexual harassment is unwelcome conduct of a sexual nature, which can include unwelcome sexual advances, requests for sexual favors, or other verbal, nonverbal, or physical conduct of a sexual nature.”

            This can include anything from catcalls on a street corner to cyber and in-person bullying in schools to inappropriate sexual advances and even rape. Women are constantly taught that if they wear something provocative or revealing they are “asking for it.” That is so not true. What’s under a woman’s short skirt belongs to her and wearing a short skirt does not mean a woman wants attention, sex, or to be raped. Wearing a short skirt shows how proud you are to be a woman, how happy you are that you have gorgeous legs, and how strong you are to walk out of your house with a short skirt on knowing that you can be looked at inappropriately.

Men must understand that a woman’s body is her own and that a woman has a right to wear what she wants without being disrespected or violently attacked, but sadly women don’t have that security yet. It saddens me to know that women and girls all over the world are still being burned, stoned to death, circumcised, raped, murdered, beaten, battered, sterilized, targeted, hunted, enslaved, forced to marry, silenced, and aborted. Knowing about these atrocities discourages me and makes me feel powerless against the system of patriarchy. Realizing that I am an endangered species is not only depressing but frightening. To know that any day and at any time I or my sister, mother, grandmother, niece, aunt, or best friend may be stalked, raped, and murdered just for being female.

Some men contradict themselves. They talk about how woman wearing short skirts are “sluts” and deserved to be raped, but what does “sagging” your pants say about you. Ok, let me guess it says you’re an overachiever, that you care about education, that sense of style, or maybe it shows that you haven’t washed your underwear in three weeks. So what gives you the right to criticize a woman wearing a short skirt when you are showing your butt crack for the whole world to see? Here are some reasons I found about how showing your underwear is not cute:

1. No one wants to see your dingy underwear- Men have such a big ego that they think that everyone would want to see their underwear. Why do they think they are that special?
2. You make yourself look like a criminal. People that sag their pants are going to suffer from some profiling issues.
3. No one will take you seriously. I have never seen anyone take someone with sagging pants seriously. Especially when it comes to jobs, but even when it comes to relationships.
4. Everyone knows you're just trying to be rebellious. People sag their pants for the simple fact that most other people do not. They want to stand out and feel special somehow
5. It is disrespectful. It is rude to make everyone look at your butt. Besides, sagging pants makes you walk stupid, and that's not a good look either.
6. No woman of value will want you- No woman will take you home to their parents with your pants sagging. You won’t even make it in the door before you get a dirty look from her parents.

             So the biggest lesson to learn here for men is before you judge look at yourself in the mirror. For my phenomenal woman I encourage you to watch or read the Vagina Monologues. This play will make you think about your body, and how to love and enjoy being a woman. I also want you to think about what your skirt means to you. My skirt means happiness and liberation. It does not define me but shows that I am proud to be a woman. “My short skirt is a liberation flag in the women's army. I declare these streets, any streets my vagina's country,” said Eve Ensler.

Poetry Slam

Poetry Slam:)
Hey, awesome and loyal readers, let’s take a chill pill this week and read some poetry by some amazing women, including me of course. I hope this poetry gets you through the day and makes you want to smile because it has inspired me. If you have any poems I would love to post them when I have a slam again. Don’t forget to add me as a friend and like my blog posts. Oh, and pass my amazing blog along to your friends because nothing is better than “ mumzing my work,” lol, cause as I said before you’re a cool person, and I’m a cool person, so why can’t we be cool people together? Love you guys a lot, and keep your eye out for for next week’s post entitled “ My short skirt" pertaining to how what woman wear says she is either a slut, or educated person.There will also be some comparison to men "sagging" their pants and women wearing short skirts. So... yeah, you can read up on that next week. Stay tuned:)

Who am I ?

I am Nkenge

Daughter to all who are willing to teach me I am caramel colored, mixed with the roots of my family

My individuality and love has toppled over the ocean and is searching for individuals who are thankful for my uniqueness

I am a lion, I aim to protect, because I never want to look into the eyes of a person I neglect

I am a soul searcher

Always looking for good in the hearts of people

Like a flower, I continue to grow and add compassion, love, or hope to my forever blossoming rose

I was born to put smiles on the faces of the lost

My heart and mind soars above the clouds because I am out of reach

I am an eagle because I will always be in flight

Moving, looking, for a mission to accomplish

                    One Flaw in Women

   

Author- Unknown

Women have strengths that amaze me

        
They bear hardships and they carry burdens, but they hold happiness, love and joy.

 

They smile when they want to scream.

 

They sing when they want to cry.

 

They cry when they are happy

 

and laugh when they are nervous.

 

They fight for what they believe in.

 

They stand up to injustice.

 

They don't take "no" for an answer

when they believe there is a better solution.

They go without so their family can have.

They go to the doctor with a frightened friend.

They love unconditionally.

They cry when their children excel

and cheer when their friends get awards. They are happy when they hear about

a birth or a wedding.

Their hearts break when a friend dies.

They grieve at the loss of a family member,

yet they are strong when they

think there is no strength left.

They know that a hug and a kiss

can heal a broken heart.

Women come in all shapes, sizes and colors.

They'll drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail you

to show how much they care about you.

The heart of a woman is what

makes the world keep turning.

 

 

HOWEVER, IF THERE IS ONE FLAW IN WOMEN,

IT IS THAT THEY FORGET THEIR WORTH.

These Lost, These Come At A Cost Women

I see these city lights and flashy cars

These beautiful women lost under stars

These daughters and sisters and mothers

These lost women

These come at a cost women

Given a glance then a dance

Given the means to live by the fiends of these beautiful women

Lost in a daze of green

A daze I've seen

Spotlights on these beautiful women

Eyes on these and cheers for these beautiful women

Lies in these and fears in these lost women

These come at a cost women

Show, bought and ready to go

At a price higher then they know

These women worth more then gold

Priceless

But still sold Oh these lost women

Don't you know your beautiful

Not hot women

That your beautiful

Not meant to be bought women

Beauty needs to be taught in these women

Instead of this that is not

Left in them to rot

Oh these beautiful women

 These I've seen

Women whos pupils are all green

Men whos eyes are gazed in between wide thighs

Silent cries eventually taking its toll

Night after night eventually breaking the soul

 

I see these city lights and flashy cars

These beautiful women lost under stars

These daughters and sisters and mothers

These lost women

These come at a cost women

 

Don't you know your beautiful

Not hot women

That you’re beautiful

Not meant to be bought women.

Touched by An Angel by Maya Angelou

We, unaccustomed to courage

exiles from delight

live coiled in shells of loneliness

until love leaves its high holy temple

and comes into our sight

to liberate us into life.

 

Love arrives

and in its train come ecstasies

old memories of pleasure

ancient histories of pain.

Yet if we are bold,

love strikes away the chains of fear

from our souls.

 

We are weaned from our timidity

In the flush of love's light

we dare be brave

And suddenly we see

that love costs all we are

and will ever be.

Yet it is only love

which sets us free

 

What is the ideal woman?

          What is The Ideal Woman?

What is the ideal woman? Anyone one can sit down and name things that make a woman special or unique, but what do those things entail?To me the ideal woman knows to keep quiet when a man   is talking and to only speak when being spoken to. She cooks and cleans the house while taking care of the children. She is only there for pleasure and bearing children. Her only phrase would be, “Yes dear, no problem.”The ideal woman aims to please. Okay (giggles) let me cut the crap, what kind of feminist would I be, saying this is the ideal woman. This might be the ideal woman for some, but this is not how I see myself EVER. Let’s drop the word ideal because let’s face it no one is perfect no matter how hard you try. Let’s talk about women in general.

A woman loves who she is and how she looks; whether she is a size 2 or 30 she knows she is perfect. I’m not going to lie, being a size 30 is not healthy, but cherishing your body is better than hating it.A strong woman speaks her mind and has a firm hand with her family. She is the glue that holds everything together in her family. When I pick up a magazine like Glamour, Vogue or 17 Magazine I see women being shown half naked to sell fragrances or cars; seriously put some clothes on you’re  better than that. They’re  also really skinny, like don’t you eat any food! You can come to my house and I will be happy to feed you. With all of these advertisements around it may be difficult not to objectify women.

Female stereotypes in the media tend to undermine women as a whole, and diminish them to sexual objects and passive human beings. But what message does this send to young girls, that if you’re  skinny and thin you’re  beautiful, but if you’re  fat you’re  ugly. Or if your hair is straight and long more people will like you than if your hair is thick and curly. Now these stereotypes are just plain stupid, but girls actually strive to be like the women they see in magazines or on television. But why are women objectified in the media?

Men are more comfortable with women in these roles because they pose no real threat to their power, dominance, or masculinity.No man wants a woman to make more money than them; everything with men is a competition. It also maintains an image of what women should look like, so when young girls see these images they know what is expected of them. It keeps women focused on an idea that can almost never be obtained, and it keeps women from focusing on careers, politics, sports and school, areas that were once a man’s domain. Men achieve two things with these stereotypes: one is they get a woman who is less power driven, and two they get women who are attractive or striving to be. That may be why more girls have eating disorders compared to men. In actuality girls make up 90 percent of all people with eating disorders. Here are some pictures of women being objectified in the media.
 

What is the key to fighting this crisis? Let’s think, do you know? Being educated is the key. “Education is the power to think clearly, the power to act well in the world's work, and the power to appreciate life,” said Brigham Young. Education is a universal language recognized around the world. It allows people to interact on a broad level with people of different cultures and achieve goals they have set for themselves.  Education is the power to think for you. So when you read a magazine ask yourself: Do I want to look like her, or do I want to be myself and stay true to myself?       So now that I have you thinking about what you see when you pick up a magazine or look at a billboard on the train, maybe you won’t think that you are not special because you don’t look like the artificial woman you see, because in actuality they’re photoshopped. At least you can say you have natural beauty. Leave comments, I would love to read them! Click the like post also and add me as a friend, I’m a cool person and you’re a cool person, so why can’t we be cool people together:)